Waiting is different from resting.
Although waiting and resting often manifest the same way, they are not birthed from the same place. I know…waiting seems like a very unlikely weapon in the whole analogy of warfare doesn’t it? I will admit it hasn’t been my weapon of choice. I have struggled with impatience—maybe you can relate?
If I’m completely honest, I will tell you that I have struggled with the ungodly belief that waiting is a punishment or consequence for not performing my best. Waiting has always confronted my pride and ego, because after all, if I have to wait it means I must be lacking somehow. Ugh. Let me just clear the air…EVERYTHING about me is lacking, that’s why I need the LORD.
Can you relate? We’ve all been there, right? Every one of us has come upon this place of waiting…the intersection where the red light is stuck and there is seemingly NO MOVEMENT. We have all experienced a season where we have had to wait. Maybe that’s you now? Maybe you’ve been waiting a LONG time and you are tired and frustrated. Take heart and hold fast, because God wants to re-work the way you view waiting.
Strangely enough, I have recently found myself embracing this weapon. There is something about the waiting that has me captivated. I have been reminiscing back to the beginning of my faith journey as I think about the waiting and I see how God has re-framed this concept. Hindsight is always 20/20, right?
I was 15 years old, away from home in a foreign country.
I knew in my spirit I was supposed to go to Trinidad on that summer mission trip (back in the summer of 1988) and I fought hard to get my parents on board. When I look back, I know it had God’s hand all over it, because in the flesh it sounds crazy. It’s just the kind of crazy I was up for…took Mom and Dad a little while to catch up. I left, by bus, with about 30 other students from our pick up point at the Toronto International Airport, and we made our way down the Eastern Seaboard picking up other crazy students bound for various parts of the world. We arrived in Florida for a two-week boot camp and then we were deployed all over the world.
I spent almost 8 weeks in Trinidad where we built a storage building on the side of the mountain. This was a formation time for me in my spiritual life. The organization I went with was pretty strict, so we followed a steady routine and we worked hard. I worked construction that summer, using simple humble tools. Everything we did, we did by hand. I learned what hard work really looks and feels like, I learned that relationships take grace and humility, and I experienced a complete re-framing of attitude.
Because we were working at a Christian Camp in the mountains we had some incredible places to rest during out free time. There is something about the mountains that speak to me about the majesty and sovereignty of God, and that summer I met the LORD in new ways. It was on that mountain that I heard the voice of the LORD calling me into ministry and I couldn’t say no. Literally and figuratively, there was nothing in me that even wanted to resist this holy invitation.
I grew up in a home where the gospel was known. I grew up watching my parents host Bible Studies in their home and eventually participating with them. But on that mountain, on my own, far away from the comforts of home, the LORD arrested my attention and I could not get enough. It was such a powerful time of communion with HIM that my only response was:
“Take my life and let me serve you.”
I struggled to re-enter my life when I came home. There were things—glorious things—the Lord had allowed me to see, that I could not un-see, and the contrast between that and my life at home, created such a confrontation in my spirit. It was just hard. My friends could not relate, did not share my passion, and none of us knew how to find common ground.
I spent hours researching mission organizations because I had convinced myself that I was going to quit school on so I could head off to the mission field. At that time the only thing that I could think of that made sense was working in an orphanage in Central America. I love my Mom, because she is always straight with me. In the middle of my research, one day, she informed me that while she and Dad supported my desire to give my life to ministry, I should really re-think the whole quitting school, plan. She went on to say that in all my research I should look at what requirements and skills sets some of these organizations are looking for, because she was pretty confident they were not interested in uneducated, ill-equipped people not matter how passionate their hearts. Ouch. She then went on to say if still wanted to quit school then I should be prepared to move out and get a job. Harsh, but it served to be a very helpful and fruitful directive.
I am thankful for how God spoke through her to help me slow down. When I look back I remember being frustrated and impatient. I had heard from the LORD and I was willing to get after it. He knew. He knew my heart because He had opened my eyes to things I had never imagined and He Himself had stirred my heart. He had planted faith and courage in me…He knew that when it came right down to it, I would move on the word Go. A lack of passion was never the issue. In fact, a lack of skill wasn’t even the real issue. The issue had everything to do with identity and trust.
God knows. He knows well what can happen when we run ahead outside of his covering. He knows well, how the environment will respond and what the elements can produce in the right rhythm and place. I like to think of it as the “Wait for it, wait for it, wait for it!—principle.”
“But those who wait on the LORD
shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings like eagles.
They shall run and not be weary.
They shall walk and not faint.”
Is. 40:31
When you read this in other translations the word “wait” is replaced with “trust.” That summer of 1988? We had to memorize 40 scripture verses and this Isaiah verse was one of them. This verse has been with me in spirit right from the beginning, but it wasn’t until recently that I grabbed ahold of that one little word and what it means.
Wait…Trust…Hope expectantly.
Let me tell you another quick story, because there are some extremely helpful tidbits that will help bring better understanding to the waiting.
Last month my friend gave me an amazing gift. My birthday was in early April and she arranged for us to do a “healing project” together. She has a friend who is a local artist and art teacher who had developed a pottery project that provides a process in healing. First of all, she had me at “Pottery Project” but when she followed it up with quiet, together time, it took it to another whole level! This has been a heavy year for both of us so we were looking forward to this little project.
I’ve always wanted to do pottery and this did not disappoint. I learned some interesting things about pottery that were completely new. First of all, Clay is decomposed rock and the process of decomposition take thousands of years to happen…maybe even more. Clay is made up of minerals and water. It looks like mud and it feels like slimy sludge. Clay can be molded but it requires a pretty specific preparation and combination of pressure and elements to achieve its form. Too much pressure and water and the clay will fail. If it hasn’t been wedged enough it will fail. In fact, if it isn’t prepared correctly even if you do everything right to shape it, it will fail in the firing process. Here’s the bottom line: if you use clay that isn’t ready it will fail. It’s all about timing.
These lessons in the pottery studio were pretty amazing. I’ve been thinking about it for weeks as we completed our projects and brought them home. Little prayer bowls; the miracle of waiting, the right combination of preparation, the pressure of hands, water, and fire. It sits on my piano in front of my eyes in the place I love to pray.
Decomposition takes time.
There is a certain undoing that occurs when you give your life to Christ. The “old man” has to die in order for new birth to happen. We get that. We understand. And yet we don’t. We get a vision and a call and we are off to the races. And that, my friend, is passion. There is nothing wrong with passion or skill—those are pretty important parts of the formula. But it isn’t about just getting the job done…it’s about trust.
Waiting on the LORD, is not about ceasing all activity, because waiting is active. Waiting, although it can be a stoppage of activity, is powerful because it is the position of TRUST. In the waiting there is a powerful decomposition that occurs when one submits or yields to the Spirit of God. Under the Lord’s cover, just as the rock decomposes deep within the earth’s crust, we experience this miraculous transformation by the hands of God. Everything that comes at us is used to fill us and strengthen us with just the right combination of minerals so that we will not fail when go through the fire. In the waiting we do nothing—but HE does the miraculous!
Wait…Trust…Hope expectantly.
Waiting isn’t a punishment. Waiting is attending to the most important thing: trust. God, who is mighty and sovereign, does everything when we open the door with our agreement. Wanna know what TRUST does? It cuts the enemy off at his knees. When we trust the LORD it creates a powerful force that overcomes the impossible. The enemy works hard to undermine our trust, which is why we have to keep our eyes on God and remember his faithfulness. When we wait we are trusting. I LOVE this!
Waiting is a powerful weapon but it isn’t a once and done kind of thing. We actually have to wear this one. This is one you want to keep close because it serves double duty…it’s both defensive and offensive. It cuts him off as it guards our hearts and sends him reeling.
Wait…Trust…Hope expectantly.
Don’t despise the waiting dear one, because you aren’t living for some future event. The call, the promise, whatever it is isn’t an event or thing that we strive toward. When you wait, you are in the middle of the fulfillment of destiny. Embrace it. Embrace it like garment of armor.
Wait—Trust—he won’t disappoint.